Needless to say, I felt like I had hit rock bottom. I used to lie awake at night wondering, “Why me?” “Why was life so hard?” “Why are relationships so hard?”
I was angry, fed up, and depressed. And I mean, REALLY depressed. There were many times I wanted to just throw in the towel and give up on life, on dating, and on people in general.
But despite all my negativity, I still had a ray of hope within me that things would improve. I hoped and prayed that the repairs being done on my parents’ house would soon be completed; that I’d eventually recover from the flu; that my stress level at work would decrease; and that I’d eventually get past the pain of my breakup and be able to find someone else.
And to this day, I’m forever grateful for that ray of hope because it kept me going throughout that terrible ordeal. It enabled me to stay positive in knowing that my parents would eventually be able to move back into their home again after the hurricane. It forced me to slow down and take it easy so I could finally recuperate from the flu. It motivated me to go back on Match.com and start dating again. And it helped me stay the course and not give up whenever I had the misfortune of having a bad date.
And it’s a darn good thing I stayed the course because seven months later, I met a man on Match who is now my fiancé.
Why am I telling you all this? Because I want you to realize that no matter how bleak things might look in your love life right now, things can always change. If you had told me in December 2012 that I’d be spending December 2016 with the man of my dreams, I would have seriously questioned your sanity. Because at that time, everything in my life was a mess. But fast forward four years to 2016, and my life is so much better and more satisfying now.
The reality is, you never really know who you’re going to meet or what’s going to happen tomorrow or anytime in the future. The only thing that’s a given is your ability to have hope and faith that somehow, someday things will get better. Because without hope, everything in life becomes so much harder.
If you keep walking around with a frown on your face and a chip on your shoulder, the only people you’ll attract are other folks with frowns on their faces and chips on their shoulders. But if you choose to be hopeful, others will pick up on your sense of optimism and positive energy. When you have hope and faith, your life will become better and more enjoyable regardless of whether there’s a man in it.
So as the New Year rolls around, I ask that you make one very important New Year’s resolution: to keep that ray of hope alive within you. Please don’t ever give up on your hopes and dreams of finding that special someone! Because you never really know when he might show up. It might be tomorrow, 6 months, or even 2 years later. But by keeping that ray of hope alive, I assure you that you’ll enjoy your dating journey a lot more, knowing that he’s somewhere out there waiting to find you!
When 2017 begins, you have an important choice to make. You can either:
1. Choose to feel angry and bitter that you haven’t met Mr. Right yet.
2. Choose to feel hopeful that things in your love life will improve and get better.
Only you get to decide. It is my sincere hope that you’ll make the latter choice in the coming year.