If your partner is repeatedly rude, disrespects you, puts you down, or belittles you in any way, please dump him ASAP!Life is too short for you to waste time and emotional energy on someone who treats you like dirt! Stop dismissing and start paying attention your partner’s bad behavior! I don’t care how good looking or wealthy he is, or what an amazing lover he is!If your partner shows signs of having poor character, then please, PLEASE heed those signs and run! Your partner is not going to magically morph into a warm, caring person anytime soon. If you don’t believe me, then think back to your prior relationships where your partner mistreated you. Did he ever change? Probably not!
You deserve a partner who will love, cherish and respect you.Only then can you have the type of soulmate partnership that you’re yearning for. FROM THIS POINT ON, MAKE A VOW TO ONLY DATE AND PURSUE RELATIONSHIPS WITH MEN WHO TREAT YOU THE WAY YOU WANT TO BE TREATED.
Red Flag #2: Incompatible relationship goals
Do you want marriage and he doesn’t?Is starting a family important to you, but your partner doesn’t want children? Are you looking for a long-term committed relationship, but he just wants to date casually? If you discover that you and your partner do not share the same vision on where your relationship is headed, then it’s best to cut your losses and move on.
Many people choose to ignore these differences in hopes that their partners will change their mind and give them the type of commitment they are looking for.Unfortunately, this almost never happens. Chances are, if he tells you now that he never wants to get married, he still won’t want to get married six months or one year later. Rather than pressuring your partner to make a commitment that he doesn’t want or doesn’t feel ready for, why not just find someone else who has the same relationship goals as you? Your relationship will be much easier and more harmonious when you and your partner are both on the same page about where your relationship is headed.
Red Flag #3: Irresponsible behavior
If you’re seeking stability in your relationship, you mustn’t ignore signs that your partner lives his life in an irresponsible manner. Some examples of this include:
- Not calling or showing up when he’s supposed to
- An inability to manage his everyday finances (e.g. not paying his bills on time, not saving for retirement)
- Drug or alcohol abuse
- Failure to take proper care of himself (e.g. neglecting serious health problems, eating a poor diet, etc.)
- Driving recklessly
If your partner is irresponsible in the way he conducts his own life, he’s certainly not going to be responsible in the way he acts towards you.
Red Flag #4: His words and actions don’t match
Have you ever been with someone who says one thing and does the opposite? This is a HUGE red flag! Your partner’s actions should be aligned with his words. For example, if a guy tells you he wants a serious, committed relationship, but after 3-4 months, he still hasn’t shown any signs of committing, e.g. doesn’t date you on a steady basis, hasn’t introduced you to any of his family or friends, hasn’t taken down his profile down on the online dating websites, etc., then it’s obvious that he’s not interested in settling down anytime soon. If you’re not sure whether to pay more attention to a man’s words or actions, ALWAYS pay more attention to his actions. As the old saying goes, actions speak louder than words!
Red Flag #5: It’s all about him
Consider it a big red flag if your date constantly talks only about himself and rarely shows any interest in you. Relationships are a two-way street! He should be just as curious to find out about you as you are about him. In a healthy relationship, both partners are keenly interested in each other’s thoughts, opinions, and ideas. Each person values what their partner has to say and there is mutual concern for each other’s needs and feelings. Stay away from selfish, self-centered people who think and act like the whole world revolves around them and no one else matters!
If you happen to encounter any of these 5 red flags when dating, there’s only one thing you need to do: RUN!
I firmly believe that ignoring red flags is one of the main reasons why so many relationships fail. I used to ignore red flags all the time when I dated. I deceived myself into thinking that the warning signs would just magically disappear on their own, which of course they never did. In fact, one of the biggest lessons I learned when dating was that red flags don’t turn green! Once they show up, they’re here to stay!
Now I want to hear from you. Which of these 5 red flags have you encountered in your own dating experience? Looking back on your past relationships, do you find that you have a tendency to heed the red flags or ignore them? Please share your thoughts and comments below.